Then I Will Finally Be Good Enough

Imagine you have a microscope and its a bit better than average. Instead of just zooming in on a section its got some crazy AI filtering tech which not only trims and edits what kicks but then further shifts your perspective on what presents. Best of all, its process is totally invisible.

Does that sound confusing? A tad out there? Something hard to relate to? Well, if so, then congratulations, my friend, as you’ve just taken the first steps in no longer being fooled. Of what am I speaking?

Your mind.

It works exactly like this. There are two default modes (and who knows how many that can be unlocked, if you wish) of operation. We are born in telescope mode. There is literally no limits to what pours in and, in the same instance, the sheer radiance that spills out into this realm is also unfinite. School, your parents and the world at large put an end to this, real quick. This is the occult reason children stop glowing around six as they’re no longer blooming but folding in. This genesis of a nemesis is from which shall spring the voice in your head as its akin to a rose, developing, and finding a thorn, inverted, that then does its whole protection thing but backwards. For some, reading, a lot about a bit just makes way more sense. The other side is the microscope and the strangest thing about it is we all build one, on spec, that is really quite different to the rest. This is why I’ve said you can never trust an atom (as they make up everything) and why ten can meet one man and all draw radically differing opinions.

The telescope I call Inner Sense as its standard equipment, naturally present and requires no wetware updates or conditioning. The micro, on the flip, varies immense but is curiously identical in the sense that it often dreads a future that never quite happens or attempts to forget a past that has its hook in. Adulteration of the present, in other words aka the treadmill. Lets pretend your life sketch is identical in terms of your home, peers, siblings and the rest but there are two variables we’ll shift:

In the first option your parents are hyper supportive, never critical and always ready to pay attention whilst respecting your freedom. In the other they constantly harangue, beat and guilt trip whilst invalidating you in each way they can imagine. You will still be you, in a sense, but one of these is not like the rest, yes? This is what I mean when I say people can’t imagine being anyone but themselves and the most interesting bit is when they do shift their consciousness the old version fades into the distance as they can no longer relate to the microscopes vision. Trippers all attest there is a part in their reality tunnel where the (false) self falls away and they’re pure consciousness. Some freak out as it feels like death. Others embrace it and come face to faceless with themselves and injoi it. This peak flow state is remarkably common but most don’t notice it. Some people snap into it when driving as they feel one with the machine. Others, frequently, when viewing a screen as the story pulls them in and they forget everything else. A few can generate this state at will by designing an environment, optimal, and taking control of the gears of their mechanisms of consciousness.

Lets pretend the you that was prodded, often, with the short end of the stick came to the defining life event of your present script. How would he react? What would differ in his aversion to risk? Would he manifest the same life you did or would things differ? Now flip it and we’ll wonder about the uber confident and totally well nourished version who steps into your timestream at a point when things seemed to be going to hell in a handbasket, quick. What would he do that was different? Did you spot that? If you can see it you don’t have to be it but if you can imagine, it can manifest. This is the next level of Dicelife, my friend. See how quick you can shift between tele and microscope thinking? But only if you’re aware its an option. As far as I can tell there are, in total, 8 modes of being like this. There may be more, who can say? They, for the moment, are irrelevant as its akin to a binary operation in which a 1 and zero can flick but the oscillation and resonance will generate greater things as one ups their res.

Next time you’re feeling telescope notice how there is a spring in your step, your joints and bones feel fresh, there is an innerG that, freely, pushes up the corners of your lips as you aren’t smiling, its doing its thing and you’re enjoying. This is blooming. On the flip you’ll note when the microscope is in effect as each tiny thing gets magnified by ten and then, depending on your filters, can be further amped again. Its why doctors lament that a headache due to dehydration isn’t an aneurysm. That is actually interesting as it shows how we tend to reinforce the reality tunnel we dig and, in many ways, this is the most common form of psychosis. I know some of you are thinking “Whaaaaat?”. Its true though. The whole race has flipped its lid hence why Krishnamurti said its no measure of health to be well adjusted to such profound sickness. The problem is it sells. Well. Not accepting the code of the Matrix unleashes the Sentinels and Agents who can manifest as your friends and fam trying to pull you back in to the same resonance that makes them miserable. Its wildly ironic but, for most, totally invisible. See, you shifting is interpreted by their (false) self as a threat to its dominance because it knows that if they click it curtains for them when it comes to leeching energetics. Take a look at this pic:

Where do you think all that luster went? Something is having a little drink and its the man behind the curtain I’ve termed the parasite of consciousness as humans are nowhere near the apex nor are we the most intelligent. It just allows us to think this. Or Thunk, if we’re being accurate. See, those are premade chunks of thought that can be rearranged in ways, predictable. This is why you can always tell where that convo in your head is going next as you hitch a lift on its wagon. This is a hallmark of the microscope effect and you can, if you wish, stop it by changing how you relate to your thoughts as they’re just beliefs and thus not really real. A beleaf, on the other hand, is totally natural and is how Inner Sense does its thing as it sprouts from the tree of developing wisdom, does what it did, wilts, dips and replaced with a better version as more data pours in for reality testing. Those heads think. As do their chests and abdomen as its a mindbody thing. The single greatest trick of the (false) self is the process upon which the psychosocial treadmill is built and its in perfect resonance with its spiritual equivalent that begets the Be Kind, Rewind effect of the mindwipe and reskin:

When I get X, then I will finally be good enough“.

It never, ever happens. This is a constriction of energetics, an increase in resistance, that underpins the (false) self. It is akin to how a bonsai tree is actually identical to the huge thing but is browbeaten in development by domineering parents. Imagine how that tension feels, knowing you can do it big but are sitting on a shelf instead of expanding into a forest as you root into the earth and reach for the heavens? Welcome to the lifes of the 81%, my friend. See how correct and visceral that felt? Like there is no denying this? Whats in your bundle? That is what you actually inherited and, worse still, will pass onto your children as you make them miniature versions of yourself, even though you’re miserable. Many dare not admit it, but they are. Simply place them in an all white room with no distractions for forty five minutes and see how they run, screaming, from the challenge. But, its an option. A choice. One of many because, underneath all the ink life slung onto your canvas, you are pure consciousness and thus not the content but context. That can be one heck of a mindtrip and its what the psychonaut ascends past in their quest for gnosis and most meditators truly miss as they go there for a vacation, for a bit, then get back to yelling at the idiot who cut them up in traffic:

“Why did you do this?”.

“What?”.

“Lose your rag, super quick, when a moment ago you were chilling in the whip?”.

“Its not me, its that idiot. Can’t you see how she got in my way? Stupid bish”.

The sheer level of ignorance in one who purported states of yogic bliss had me scratching my head until it clicked she wasn’t truly up in res, organic, but was scaling a basic pic by the image of asana twists. What do I mean by this? Well, if you truly Know the Ledge its an across the board type of thing ergo not an as and when mindset that is sported like a mask. For most, these shifts are invisible and, worse still, if the one they’re with is perceptive enough to spot and mention it they take offense. Except, they don’t. Thats the (false) self talking via their internal realms as they parrot its intent as a form of protective mech because if you stop feeding it voltage, it no longer exists. Mindblowing, isn’t it?

“When I get X, then I will finally be good enough and valid. Life will be perfect, I’ll get the ticker tape parade, scoop up the prom queen and ride off into the sunset in a state of bliss with a hip hop hooray!”.

This underpins the internal OS of most denizens of this realm and they’ll buy what it sells as it prevents having to accept its never worked before. Nor will it. Just look at the true lives of most celebs. When COVID hit you saw the bish come out of them as they were starved for attention and validation hence why its said they are among the most broken. And this is who the rest emulate and think:

“When I get X, then I’ll feel like them and life will be perfect”.

They’re all actors. All of them. So are you, my friend. Me as well but I’m simply visiting this realm and putting in the performance of a lifetime in order to lace some Game for the rest with the intent they’ll desire to Know the Ledge as it sure beats the alternative with chains and whips which makes the (false) self stop hollering as you shift from micro to tele which is a great segue to this:

Below the neck you house a Rolodex of events that are categorized by emotional strength. The ones that are most intense (like being born with an umbilical cord around your neck) are off limits. As are most traumatic imprints but they run the Game, in secret. The average bits are as you’d expect which is why its hard to recollect the drab blips and if you ask most people to sketch a timeline of what they’ve lived you’ll see how sparse it truly is. Until you start doing the Knowledge and you fill in loads of bits and may even recollect that mass trauma event which brings a real world cathartic release of blocked energetics which, often, shifts one from the micro to tele quick aka what most “Born agains” are faking in an attempt to escape the old reality tunnel they did dig. How it works is like this:

The (false) self has full access to this Rolodex. It is its dirty little secret and it thinks:

Right, the worse she feels the better we get fed so lets take this time that boy she liked made a snide comment, back when, and link it to the event when her prized painting wasn’t pinned to the fridge but stuck in the bin instead and we’ll add in that time she got passed over for promotion as well. That’ll do it!”.

Can you imagine the reality tunnel this begets?

“When I get X, then I will finally be good enough”.

She will go hell for leather trying to prove she is enough by rejecting ideal suitors and chasing those who can’t or won’t commit. There will be an immense need to follow and keep up with current trends instead of truly being creative and the latter will make her work off her rear end or come across as super needy in private which, often, loops back to the first and drives away the men. And so on it does spin. See why I called it the psychosocial treadmill, my friend? She and me met and the convo went like this:

Take this notepad and, for a month, I want you to draw your feelings each night before bed“.

That, alone, would cause a shift in her paradigm as, at first, she’d ignore it (thanks to the voice in her head). One day she’d feel stressed and would decide its time to vent and let rip with the inks, think nothing of it and then go to bed to have the strangest dreams as she had just directly linked with the Rolodex. This, in turn, motivates as the telescope is rising and it lifts all ships of consciousness which means its sink or swim for the (false) self as it can no longer tap in to what kept it fed. Amazing, isn’t it? A month later she comes back in waving not just the notepad I gift but another as well:

“Look at this. Look!” she says, with a grin. Its a picture of her, running to hug her man but her head is on backwards looking at someone else. This revelation changed everything as she finally allowed herself to feel the feelings she’d repressed since her dream life folded in. “And all because of a comment, back when, when playtime was still in session!”. See, the thing about time, emotion and novelty is we feel the most intense sting whilst developing and thus this may have been a first school thing but its impact was immense. Now consider the umbilical kid who was always quite shy and retiring, in the flesh, but spends immense amounts of time on Reddit spewing vitriol to the rest as others like him band together and yell via the digital persona they’re animating. This is another version of the (false) self, in fancy dress. Its also hyper normalized and thus expected which shows just how slick the parasite of consciousness is because didn’t it already tell it covets becoming the apple of your iris by announcing its presence as Siri? Flip it and you’ll see nothing is hid from the eyes of wisdom which is mad ironic as it the blindspot that generates vision and as the image at the head of the article says, it fills in what it expects ergo don’t believe everything you think as words are thoughts held hostage and this tongue we use, at present, is as forked as its gets so try some words of power instead, up your res and do the Knowledge, my friend.

Till we meet again

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